I am going to write a bunch of phrases down and you tell me the funny ones. Just write down the numbers of the ones you think are funny
1. That moment when you fall asleep on the couch and wake up in your bed. And you live alone.
2. Age 11: "I whip my hair back and forth!" Age 37: "I drive my kids back and forth!" Age 69: "I rock my chair back and forth!"
3. Friend: H3yy w@tt r y0üu d0!nq. Arr u 0n tw!ttëR?
Me: I am at Barnes and Noble buying you a dictionary
4. Who needs good grades when you got "Swag"?! *6 years later* Heres your fries sir.
5. Me: I like that… Me: *looks at price tag* … Me: I don't like that anymore
6. Weird… Some guy just gave me half of a peace sign
7. The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.
8. To those girls on "My Super Sweet 16" that start crying when daddy buys them the wrong color BMW. SHUT UP! I ride a bike.
9. I love it when I buy a bag of air, and the company is nice enough to put a couple chips in it
10. That awkward moment when the guy who discovered milk had to explain what he was doing to the cow.
11. *3AM text message* "Hey are you asleep?" Â"No, I'm hunting zebras. WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU IDIOT?!
12. The awkward moment when you shout the wrong answer in class with confidence
13. Remember. If we get caught. You are deaf and I don't speak English
14. That awkward moment when your scuba diving and you see adele rolling in the deep
Read more: Which of these are the funniest?